How to Cancel a Trip

Don't miss anything, even if your heart is breaking

Yesterday, I had a reality check in the form of my bank account balance. It wasn’t pleasant, and you’re only getting the tiny tip of the iceberg, but suffice it to say that I realized, financially, I can’t comfortably make my Monterey trip.

Even though the world is on fire and this is relatively small, I’m crushed. Not just because I’m cancelling a trip, but particularly this trip, with Mary and her family, the drive down and up the Pacific Coast Highway, the whales and sea lions. But also, I was scouting out a post-grad program in the area that my kid wants to attend. And, honestly, I was going with the next chapter of my life in mind.

Instead, here’s what I’m doing, and how you should do it if you find yourself in this unenviable position:

• Check your lodging’s cancellation policy. In my case, that meant texting Mary, then explaining the ugliness behind the cancellation. When that’s done, make sure you've booked your pre-flight hotel with a flexible cancellation policy. While we book trips with an excitement that says there’s nothing that would ever cause you to cancel this trip, life happens, often filled with the folly of others. Even though it’s often less expensive to grab the pre-paid, no-cancel reservation, it can cost you later. Hotels and Airbnbs tend to allow less time to cancel, so do this first.

• Cancel the car rental. In this case, I rented through Turo on the day that payment for my entire rental was being withdrawn from my bank. Don’t let your rush to beat the withdrawal make you sloppy. In my case, it took three tries before I could properly follow their simple instructions, what with blind rage blurring my vision. I’m still not sure if the money was withdrawn or not. But the car’s cancelled, and the money will be in my account sooner or later.

• Check your calendar for any events you scheduled and have paid for. Luckily for me, I misremembered the information about my whale tour. I thought it was non-refundable, but I was wrong. The folks at Monterey Bay Whale Watching were so nice and accommodating on the phone. Save the anti-nausea medications you purchased for the ride. You’ll need them while sorting through the trip-ending finances. If you’ve purchased concert tickets through Ticketmaster, use their easy yet icky resale function. Tickets purchased from other sources can be easily listed on StubHub. It’s worth the yuck to get your money back and free up a ticket.

• Cancel your flight last, if possible, just in case some superhero swoops in and makes the trip possible at the last minute. It won’t happen, but it’ll keep you from feeling quite so hopeless. Since I was flying Southwest, I’ll get my refund as a credit. Southwest is in the midst of a lot of major changes, so double-check the amount of time you have to use those credits. In my case, it’s six months.

And lastly, to avoid such incidents in the future, make sure that anyone who has access to or impact on your finances is being rigorously honest with you and not, say, letting their mail go ignored for months at a time. If you have such a person in your life, consider inviting them on your next whale-watching ride. Remind them to be careful, those decks can get very, very slippery, and you’d hate for them to slip right into the sea.