Up in the Air
I'm getting on a plane on Friday. Should I?
This morning I had an appointment with the pain specialist who gives me shots in my ass so I can stand for more than 15 minutes at a time without throwing up from pain. After she recovered from laughing at me because I have a weepy burn from a heating pad on my right asscheek that I was afraid would interfere with this round of injections, she asked me if I’d seen the news out of Texas, where TSA checkpoint wait times reached upward of three hours earlier this week.
That’s more than an inconvenience. That’s how people miss flights through little to no fault of their own (There’s a free app that lets you check TSA wait times). The wait times are also horrible for people with disabilities or conditions that make standing for three hours a problem. If that’s you, tell a TSA agent! Don’t stand there, suffering and possibly making yourself ill. The app apparently can help with that, too. I haven ‘t used it myself yet; I’m just quoting the web page. My use of the app is so far limited to learning that you can bring antlers and artificial skeleton bones with you in both your checked and carry-on bags.
(If you needed that information, talk to me. I think I want to take a trip with you.)
While I hadn’t heard about the Texas-specific delays, I have been reminding myself to pay attention to the wait times on Friday. Even though I don’t board until 5:20 a.m., when catastrophic delays are less likely, I like to be prepared for these things. Just checked the app, and right now St. Louis Lambert International has a TSA wait time of 0-15 minutes. Cool. Will that be the case on Friday morning? Who knows!
And the TSA workers? They’re not getting paid because of the government shutdown. Legally, they can’t accept tips, even though that keeps getting suggested. There’s no law preventing you from slipping them a small gift card from a grocery store if it’s under $20, though. This traveler has some good suggestions.
I’m a pretty calm and patient traveler, always keeping in the forefront of my mind that flying is a goddamn miracle in every regard. Perfect? No. But how incredible is it that we can get in a metal tube in one place, and be in another place at a relatively predictable time, safely, in just an hour or three? I always think this before I bitch about anything flying-related.
That said, I’m worried about the air traffic controllers who’ve been working without pay for well over a month, too. This is unconscionable. It’s cruel, dangerous, and unnecessary.
Earlier today, the transportation secretary/star of “The Real World: Boston” (Jesus Christ *sigh*) Sean Duffy announced that they’re reducing air traffic by ten percent as this weekend promises to be the most understaffed for control towers since the shutdown began.
Yeah, you might want to reschedule your trip.
Or don’t, because we don’t know if/when it’ll get better. I’m not cancelling, but I’m going to pack a couple of extra outfits in case I get delayed. My decision to fly into Oakland instead of San Francisco might help. However, on my arrival, I have a layover at LAX, and another in Las Vegas on my return. Things aren’t looking great from there.
Honestly? I got time. I’d rather not spend it in the Vegas airport (or Vegas, period), but my plan is to hang tight until there’s a flight home. Such is the life of an unemployed lady of leisure (hahahaha*sob*). I’m never in a hurry to leave California, though, so I’m going to take things as they come. My return flight’s a week from today. I’d like to be home no later than Saturday so I can get to Chicago to see Patti Smith on November 17th. I’m not panicking unless that doesn’t look possible. And really, I won’t panic, but I won’t be my usual insufferable “FLYING IS AMAAAAAAAZING!!!” self for a bit.
We shall see.
Wanna make my extra airport time easier for me (and more interesting for everyone else at the gate)? You can buy me a coffee.
I feel like Vegas vomit has stories to tell, if it can remember them.